How it all started

Good Afternoon!

You may be wondering how I was inspired to start my spiritual journey in the first place, so I thought I'd give you the short version so you can get an idea....
It was a few years ago that I found myself living a life that was making me miserable. I was feeling exhausted, frustrated, and pretty much depressed all the time, and it forced me to take a look at my life!  At the time, I was living in Waco, TX, trying to keep my second try at a residential home building business going with my husband, putting him back through school, while also working as a banker at Chase Bank to make ends meet. Ugh! It tires me to even type that now! 
In an effort to keep this from getting too long and boring, I'm just going to say that due to circumstances beyond our control I decided to close down the building business.  So there I was, stuck in Waco which was way too small of a town for me, in a failing marriage that made us both bitter and frustrated people, and hating every moment of every day of my job at Chase. I didn't even begin to know in what direction I should go! After having the realization that fixing my marriage was much too large a task for me to take on alone, I enlisted the help of a therapist and some pretty amazing close friends to figure everything out.
I remember having said many times before "I am the only one that can truly make myself happy, and only I can know how it can be done". After a year and a half of getting to know my motivations, I realized that it wasn't ME making my decisions up until that point at all! It was the Ego part of me that learned what I'm supposed to do and how I'm supposed to live from life (parents, friends, teachers, society as a whole).  I figured out that all of the things I'd so desperately "wanted", I had never actually wanted in the first place! So I began to start over...I accepted that my marriage was being forced, we were too different and I needed to just let it go. I transferred with Chase to Houston to get out of town, and as I drove, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders like I'd never felt before! I'd released myself from the suffering I'd taken on in order to earn the respect and approval of others. For the first time, I began to feel my freedom and joy knowing I was listening to myself, my spirit, on a deep level regardless of the opinions of others. I was also pleasantly surprised to find that not just some, but virtually ALL of my friends and family were completely supportive, helpful and loving towards me during that time. Where I expected judgement, I got none...seems like a reoccurring theme eh?
The lessons we "learn" continuously come back to us in different shapes and sizes until we can clearly see it, and learn it once and for all! They call that a Karmic pattern, and over the past few years I've been able to see my patterns more and more clearly. This has lead me to more and more happiness!!!
I'll be more then happy to answer questions or discuss if you're interested...
Sorry for the length and thanks so much for reading :-)

Love to the World
Jess